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Wedding trouble... Rss

What am I going to do? We have postponed our wedding three times because people who are important couldn't make it on the day we set (even though they knew months ahead) and now my BIL tells us he is going to be in South Africa when we set the new date. I know that my partner really wants him there and will be disappointed if we don't change the date, but at the moment I feel like I'm never going to get married. As well as that, the longer we leave it, the bigger my bump will get and I won't fit in my dress.

Should I stick to the date I set (and upset the whole family of in-laws) or re-arrange again? (I'm sure my celebrant hates me by now....)
MARRY NOW!!!! and let the in-laws forever hold their peace.

Make a stand now or the in-laws may rule your life forever!!

Go for it sweetie and son't look back. You and hubby are there... YOU TWO are the most important!!
As long as you and your DF can make it the rest are just bonuses. Unless your DF is really really unhappy about going ahead, I would. Maybe just have a BBQ or something and watch the video etc when the BIL gets back?
You need to do with is right for you and your fiance. This is your day and if you keep changing the date you will be in the same position every time.

Is OVER rude people

I know a lot of people (myself included) who get married with barely anyone there in a small ceremony and then have a 'big' wedding later. That way u don't have to keep changing the date with your celebrant and u don't have to worry about a celebrant being available when u get married with everyone there! We are going to have a close family member stand in for a celebrant and say some nice words.

Who was unable to make it to the other dates???
I think that if u have made the date well in advance, it is the fault of those who don't organise to be there on that date. This is YOUR wedding, make it work for you and DP, not everyone else. I know it's hard cause u want everyone to be there, but to keep changing the date is unfair to YOU and the caterers, celebrants, event places etc.... and the people who have prepared to be at your wedding on the date u arranged.
I would just stick to the date...its your big day, its not like you gave no notice...and if people value you enough the should change their plans not expect you to change yours.
Go and get married and enjoy the day, don't worry about everybody that can make it, if they wanted to be there they will find a way.
Good Luck
Hi,

I agree with what everyone else has said - it's your day and it's up to you to get married when you are ready, not when it's convienient for others.

Also, if these people truly care, love and RESPECT you, then they'll be there on the day instead of making other plans. If they can't be there, they'll say something along the line of "sorry I can't be there due to work/illness/other family, etc, but I'd really love to get together after you honeymoon to watch the video, see the photo's, give you your present and share a pizza/dinner/cuppa" - in other words, they'll acknowledge that it's THEIR FAULT they can't make it, but they'll do what they can to share in you special time.

So, maybe suggest to BIL that he come over after your honeymoon (cause you're not changing that either!) to see the video, look at the pics, talk endlessly about how sorry he was he couldn't make it, but here's a fantastic present (ie: expensive - haha!!) that he picked up on his travels - and throw in dinner also.

Don't change, obviously everyone thinks your at their beck-and-call and you're not!

As for your fiancé, well, who's he marrying - you or his brother..???!!! Be gentle, but if he truly loves you, he won't change the date again and he won't get upset about it and hold it against you - ever - he'll simply have a couple of beers (or cokes!) with his brother on his return - maybe a pub trip as his first solo night out without the "Missus" - haha!!!

Enjoy your day and remember it's all about YOU : )

ciao

Jenn
i think stuff them all, and do what you want, dont wait for the people that are stuffing you around, we did that and in the end my hubby's 2 brothers got into a punch up at the wedding, one had to get rushed to hospital for stichers in his face n hand, so after that happend everyone left, my wedding started at 3pm and finished at 8pm, i hated my wedding so bad, but we thinking about renewing our vows next year. so do what you and soon to be huddy wants cause its your life and day, good luck xoxo
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