Be comfortable in your skin – this is a judgement free zone. Find out more!

Huggies Forum

  1. home
  2. Baby Forum
  3. General Baby Topics
  4. Your Relationships
  5. Don't know where I stand anymore

Don't know where I stand anymore Rss

I am 25 I have two children (3yr and 2yr) . I have been with my partner for 6yrs now. After I had my first son, I just lost my sex drive.. Then after my 2nd son, its pretty much gone gone gone.
I have been to the doctors about it, I have taken pills and tried everything! I cannot get it back, Now it is really affecting my partner and I's relationship. He is cranky at me every night. He goes on and on about how I dont get intamate with him and his getting lonely and sometiems even says "better get this sex drive back or I might have to find someone else". His not a cheater, but I am starting to think he might end up been one ! !
But seriously, I have tried to explain to him how I feel.. I feel uncomfortable doing anything intamate. I do still cuddle him, kiss him, tell him I love him. But thats definatly not enough for him. I must say though, he doesnt go longer then 2weeks without sex.
Its getting to the point though, that I am sick of arguing about it and feel like just leaving him so he can find someone else to sleep with and I can stop feeling liek *** at night just because I go to sleep.
Am I been selfish or is it him? I have honestly tried everything to get my drive back.. all a fail.. I am just drained with this..


>MLDEJ





Pardon ???
woah, what guy EVER says that to hid partner yes hes frustrated but he needs ro think about how you feel.

I had a similar situation though partner was alot more understanding.

I started exercising again and found my came back naturally when i was feeling a bit bored and down i had no sex drive. Forcing yourself to have sex because he wants to just makes it worse. it will come back in its own time - ds had issues when he was feeling really down and its a complication common with anti depressants it suppresses sex drive.


Just so you know its not your fault the body does what it does and sometimes its out of our hands - maybe your body and mind are subconsciously telling you something which is for you to work out? just some ideas goodluck
You shouldn't have sex out of guilt, and he shouldn't be threatening to go somewhere else. It's obviously a difficult time in your relationship, but arguing about the matter sure as hell won't be pushing any of your buttons but those for rage!

I don't know how close you are to a capital city, but I believe there are some psychologists who specialise in matters to do with sex and relationships. Maybe you could think about talking to one of them?

Do you feel physically or emotionally uncomfortable when trying to be intimate? I would hazard a guess that physical discomfort could be because of body issues or exhaustion while emotional discomfort could be more to do with your relationship itself and/or how you perceive yourself. Do you think of yourself as a partner in an adult relationship, or the mother of 2 children? Which do you think of yourself as more? Do you feel your relationship is secure, or do you fear being in a vulnerable position with your partner?

I don't have the answer, but hopefully you can find it with some contemplation time, either with yourself or a psychologist. And as for your partner, when did taking matters into his own hands become such a hassle?!
go to the gp and get your hormone levels checked, in particular your progesterone and your testosterone...you may have an imbalance thats occured after childbirth....
Sign in to follow this topic