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  5. Dad's visiting hours at the hospital

Dad's visiting hours at the hospital Lock Rss

I think it is difficult to compare hospitals as they are clearly all different.

I had my DD in a public hospital which was absolutely fantastic. We went to hospital at 10am on saturday and had DD at 1.28pm on Sunday and stayed until Thursday. My DH was allowed to stay every night, and was also fed. The only rule was he had to make his bed (it was like a sofa bed) every morning and night. He was allowed to do whatever he wished, and I found it great to have him there.

I am not sure about this time what it will be like as he will have DD with him so I dont think they will let them stay. Our hospital is a little different as we live 2 hours away from it and so do all our rellies and friends so we were allowed visitors even in the rest times.

My advice would be if it really bothers you then have your baby in a different hospital, If they are a big hospital they are unlikely to change any policies.
Hospitals (public) usually have set times specified for partners, and general visitors. I appreciated the time with my baby when no visitors were allowed. Just ask your hospital in advance about the visiting hours, and inquire if your partner can stay a few extra hours, im sure they can arrange something.

And as for what other people have said, there is nothing wrong with the public system. I had a room to myself, the staff were fantastic, i couldnt have had it any better. Not everyone can afford to go have a baby at a private hospital.

I'm stunned at these comments. I can't believe that there are hospitals that allow such things. Your partner is most likely the father (I imagine in almost all cases) and should be allowed there whenever you want him there. Everyone I know has been allowed to have their partner stay overnight with them if they like.

I guess I was really lucky. My GP (or DH's GP which then became mine) referred me to a birthing centre which was fantastic. As they are all about natural childbirth, they encourage the partners to be there and stay overnight. All 4 of their rooms have a double bed for this purpose. The hospital that it attaches to doesn't allow fathers to stay overnight and only has single beds. I think they had certain visiting times as well - not sure though.

What happens when you need your rest but your bubs needs cuddles etc and it's outside those times? Wouldn't your partner be the best person to take care of it? Sorry if it sounds odd, but as I said, I'm just so stunned by it all.

Nessco- if you need a rest and your partner isn't there and your baby needs something, you don't rest. You care for your baby like you would if you were home.

DH stayed with me both times. The midwives really had an extra pair of hands, as he helped do my wound checks etc. He got bubs organised for feeding, ie, nappy changing etc and handed him to me. He also showered me, and made sure I had all I needed. I hardly pressed the buzzer, as DH was there and willing & able. They kept checking on me to see if all was OK, and we told them we'll buzz if we need them.

It was like being in a hotel room really, and DH never once got asked to leave.

First time round, our child was in NICU, so he stayed with me at all times - when he needed a break, he went to the cafeteria for a coffee, or up the street for a walk - out for dinner to wet the babies head one night - I needed an early night! He made sure someone was with me the whole time, and he'd fetch things I needed.

TBH, if someone (midwife) asked him to leave, he'd have nicely told them to bugger off, his baby too, and he's staying as long as he likes. Don't let the hitlers boss you around!!
I had both my bubs at Gawler Health Service and although they too have set visiting times, we found them to be more than flexible. DH stayed with me when our DD was born, being our first I wanted him there, the staff had no objections at all. When DS was born, we had family come to see him shortly after he was born at around 3am in the morning! The staff are fabulous at Gawler! We then had people coming in and out all through the day. I think that they have these set times for your own peace of mind, knowing that there is a rest period can enable you to get some rest too if you relay this time to people who want to come and visit. I can't believe that some people had their partners and husbands kicked out of the their room. That's really bizarre! Perhaps just ask a midwife next time you have an appointment if they are really strict on the times, as Gawler had them in place but were very flexible with it all when it came to immediate family. If we needed time without visitors we just told them that. The hospital didn't mind who was there and when, as long as you weren't disturbing anyone else I think. At least if people come and visit you in hospital you don't have to entertain them or get them coffee and then clean up after they have left like at home. Although most people will look after themselves and clean up after themselves anyway when they know you are home with a new baby. Good luck with your pregnancy and enjoy every second of it!

I had DD#1 thru Public and there were no issues when DH came - he was never asked to leave. Couldn't stay over night though. Went private with DD#2 and hubby came and went as he pleased, could stay if he wanted to (bit hard with 3 year old at home!!) and was fed. Midwives actively encouraged the husbands/partners to stay and be involved. It depends on hospital and policy but get reassurance now rather than worrying for the rest of pregnancy. In all honesty I was tired and used my visitor free time to rest so it didn't bother me either way.
I had my daughter in a public hospital and although there were visiting hours my husband didn't have to leave at anytime during the day. the first night he even slept in my room (there was a sofa - not very comfy)!!! however the next night the nurse on wouldn't let him stay so he went home but came back at like 6:30 in the morning coz I was exhausted!! no one seemed to mind. none of my family got kicked out in 'rest' time either.

was the same with us, but DH didnt care he showed up at 7am lol, i was sitting in bed damn bored waiting for 10:30am, and he comes walking in, straight past the nurses, he sat really quietly, didnt disturb anyone, he did refuse to leave as it was our first bub to. i would have liked him their the first night but i also enjoyed having time alone to rest nad to bond with bub (even though he slept pretty much all night)
Posted by: mum2ben
Nessco- if you need a rest and your partner isn't there and your baby needs something, you don't rest. You care for your baby like you would if you were home.

I suspect the point being made was that if the mum is exhausted and needs rest, the dad can take over if the baby needs some cuddles or general attention for something. The reason I prefer to go home 4 hours after delivery is because that way *I* can get some rest, because hubby pretty much does everything for the first month except feed the baby... heck, if he COULD feed the baby he would do that too wink

Some hubbies are a real godsend. I consider myself lucky that I've been blessed with someone willing and able to help.

I know that I personally get very stressed in hospital, and cannot sleep. Combine that with hospitals like where I had my youngest son (now 11 months old) where they actually enforced feeding so often that he wasn't hungry by the time the next "feed" cycle arrived...! I not only didn't get any sleep, my son barely got any either! The only way I eventually settled things down was for hubby to tell them to stick it where the sun didn't shine, and try to let both myself and baby get some rest, and the baby would be fed when he was hungry, not going by however many minutes since he last feed *began*. I only wish I'd known beforehand with that hospital that they would force women and babies to stay in if the babies were considered "too large" - how on earth is large seen as a health risk for a newborn? I can understand too small. I can even understand jaundiced etc... but too big and healthy looking?! Especially when all of my blood tests throughout the pregnancy are normal? Give me a break. The sad part is, this seems to be a standard in most of the hospitals - at least around NSW. So, I expect to have to deal with the same issue next time around.
Hi Raech""n"Scott,

Congratulations on your pregnancy.

Can i please ask what hosptial this is and where??
We had the most amazing experience at our hospital. DH stayed with me the entire time I was there and the only condition was that he wore PJ's to bed! (the midwives didn't particularly want to see naked husbands!). I had a little sign that I could hang on my door that said I was sleeping and the midwives would ask people to leave if I wanted rest or some quiet time!

He works some really late nights, and the hospital even made arrangements for him to come to see me via the emergency ward downstairs. The hospital believed that dad's were a huge part of the babies life and knew just how much it meant to the new mums to have their partners/ husbands/ support people with them.

If I was told with bubs 2 that there would limits on hours for dads to come, then I wuld be discussing my concerns with the midwives to come to an agreement. I couldn't imagine what it would have been like not to have DH with me when I needed him the most!

Good luck. I hope all goes well for you and your hubby. smile

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