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what would you like to have known? Rss

hi everyone. my best friend is 27 weeks preg and i just wanted to ask you all for things you have found useful or that work for you that you didnt read in books or learn in antenatal classes... different ways of wrapping, settling, anything that has worked for you that you didnt know before hand. she is pretty isolated so im trying to put together a list of everythign before she has bubs because she just cant pop round for a coffee.
so any ieas would really be appreciated.
thanks in advance
1. With my first child I was never told to look out for 'tired signs'. Once I realised what the tired signs were, my life became so much easier. That is when baby starts to clench fists, has jerky movements, will not make eye contact, and lets out a little whine. As soon as I see these signs my baby is put straight to bed, I hear a little bit of a cry and then maximum two minutes later, he is asleep. It has saved my sanity.

2. Trust your motherly instinct, you will be suprised at how often you are correct.

3. All babies are totally different, what may work for one will not necessarily work for you.

Hope that helps a little

With Maddi a couple of thing's that helped me with BF is if I'm sitting on the couch and feeding her it helps if I have a pillow on my lap then she's laying on the pillow. Don't know if it works with everyone but it really saved my back having her up higher. And in the morning if I don't quite feel like getting out of bed just yet, I lay on my side and have her next to me and feed her like that too. Even sends her back to sleep for a few hours most mornings too!

I would definitely say trust your motherly instinct too. Don't doubt yourself just because you haven't done it before.

I also would have like to known how my relationship with my DF would be effected. It took a while to get used to not being able to cuddle up on the couch whenever we wanted and all little stuff like that. I wasn't ready for that change and I felt quite lonely for the first few weeks till I adjusted.

And have plenty of spit cloths and bibs etc lol.. Babies drool a lot! Haha, I never knew that..

[Edited on 10/04/2008]
Thats a great idea!

1. I didnt know about wrapping babies to sleep at all (and I read all the books!) Somehow it passed me by...I wished someone told me of the importance of this and gave me a baby wrap (thats big enough) and told me to practise on a doll...

2. I read the breast feeding booklet they give you in hospital (ie push nipple to back of babies mouth so they have a big mouthful, including areola and make sure they have 'special K' lips) and really have a think about how it might look. This made me confident and thats 90% of successful breastfeeding (in my opinion).. And dont be worried if it doesnt happen because the baby wont starve, they will just have a bottle - no big deal (this thought also helped me).

3. The first 2 to 3 weeks are going to be extra hard and you will feel terrible with all the changes and all the hormones...But it gets better and easier every week. And more and more fun, especially when baby smiles at you (and its not just wind!)

4. Relax and dont have your baby around you constantly. You both need some time alone (even if its just in seperate rooms). Let them cry/ mumble/ squeek in thier room, they will stop (eventually). My midwife gave good advice that worked for us, let them cry for a max. of 10 mins then go in and pat them, dont make eye contact and dont pick them up unless they are very worked up. Just pat enough to calm them. This stops them learning to cry to be picked up. Our baby hardly ever cries now and she is 3 months.

5. Dont be afraid to use a dummy. It might not be 'trendy' to use one, but they are extreamly comforting to the baby (if yor baby will take a dummy) and they make life esier for both of you. My baby only takes it when she is very upset. Your baby will let you know what they want, you just have to take notice of the little things.

Hope this helps you a bit! Its a lovely idea...

Try to get your baby into a routine as soon as you can, I never did this with DD and she has only just started sleeping through (21 months) I had to sit with her for over an hr and a half for daytime sleeps and 2 hrs at night and she would wake every 2 hours.

I put my DS (3mths) into a routine early and he now puts himself to sleep most of the time. Sounds crazy but the more sleep they get the better tey sleep

I've got two girls now.

- After having the second, I still did not know about nipple shields. A god's gift if you're breastfeeding and you get cracked nipples!
- Take a dummy to hospital. My first didn't use one, the second wanted to use me as one for the first 24 hours. I asked the nurses if they had one, they shot me a look as if I had swore at the lot of them! Honestly, they are so rigid in their rules.
- Be aware that you can ask for top up feeds in hospital if you want bubs to get a bit of extra milk while you're waiting for yours to come in.
- Advice to me was that you can never have enough bibs. With the first I thought I'd managed it and I did have enough. My second was a chucker.... I didn't have enough LOL
- Muslin wraps that are at least 120 x 120cm are fantastic, especially if you want to keep wrapping bubs longer than newborn months.
- I don't think you can ever give a baby too much love

Absolute best advice I was given by my Maternal Health Nurse who was fantastic. Listen to what you know. She said even as a professional, I will never know what you know about your baby so if you think something is wrong, you tell me, don't wait to see if I tell you. Perfect advice because it's true. Chances are you'll just know what's up and when you don't, they will do everything they can to work with you to help find what it is.

Hi there, when I had my first child I was on my own & only 23.None of my friends had babies yet & I didn;t know much.The most important thing I learnt(& didn;t know untill bubs was 2 weeks old & it is one of the mot important things you should be told)was that a baby should not be up any longer than 1-1 1/2hs before being put to bed.If I was told this at the beginning I would not have had an overfed,overtired baby ,he screamed all the time & I thought he was still hungry but he was just very tired!I was amazed how he settled once I knew his tired signs. Also I play classical sleepy music in her room every night(the same cd) it helps put her to sleep.hope this helps your friend
i have a 14 mth old and am 27 weeks pregnant aswell, accupunture is a godsend for those aches and pains caused by stretching ligaments...its also fantastic for labour.

be as open minded as possible when it comes to pain relief thru labour so shes not disappointed if she needs it.

not to bother with too many 0000 clothes unless her bub is tiny they grow out of them so quick!

lots of bibs a singlets dont go astray.

cloth nappies are very handy for burping and changing bub on.

Dont expect to much of herself and her body.

If I only knew....

1. Most bottles on the market cause nipple confusion and encourage the baby to chomp rather than suckle.
The only bottle I would recommend, and highly so is the Medela special needs feeder (aka Habermen Feeder). It is amazing as it mimics the nipple and has controlled milk flow so your little one must suckle correctly.

2.Electric Breast pumps are a godsend when you need to increase your milk supply or simply when you need to rest sore nipples. And yes you are allowed to rest, it is not cruel in any way. Again I recommend Medela, I have their swing pump. Well worth the investment. Much kinder on mum than the avent pump I initially purchased.

3.Not to feel guilty if you need to supplement with formula.
S26 newborn step one is really reliable.

4.If bubs is constipated try feeding 20ml of cool boiled water 3 times a day. If the baby refuses the water add it to some expressed milk or formula.

5.If your little one has a flaky scalp, gently use a super soft toothbrush to remove the skin using a circular motion.

6.QV bath oil is the softest, most gentle product to use that doesn't have nasty chemicals.
just trying to get this into hot topics to get some more replies sorry
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