Huggies Forum

Another question for the smackers Rss

I don't want to open debate about whether to smack or not, and I'm not going to comment on anyone's response, but I'm really interested in your answers. What type of behaviour is worthy of a smack? And does it work?

Noodle 24/12/05 Mops 03/11/07

IMO, if the child has not listened to a warning (actually, with me generally more than one!) and it is something potentially dangerous. This can include things like deliberately pulling away to attempt to run onto a road, deliberately going off the property, deliberately attempting to play with dangerous items etc

As to whether it works - most times it works. Mainly because it's a last resort type thing that only happens in serious situations, IMO. Sometimes - when something is "too fun" (like leaving the property and running up the road, then giggling and running faster if someone follows!) other methods have had to be employed. I suspect that it's mainly because by the time you catch the little so-and-so, they've already had a heap of fun, and the fun is well and truly over by the time they get punishment. As long as it's immediate and not the first port of call for punishment, (and, naturally, never done in anger!) then it works.

As I'm sure pretty much everyone here who smacks will be aware, a "good smack" will never leave a mark - smacks aren't for "dishing out pain", but for shock value. That's why sometimes a hard, loud smack NEXT to the child can work just as well to get their attention. I will utilise a sudden sharp sound (like smacking the table etc) as an alternative to get attention. It doesn't work anywhere near as well, but it can give a smaller shock value if they don't realise it's coming.
Both of my kids get 2 warnings, if they have to be told a 3rd time then they will get a little smack on the hand or bum (with my DS as he wears a nappy still). It also depends on what they are doing that deserves the warnings whether they get a little smack or not. With my DD, it works and we hardly ever get past the 2nd warning as in this warning I say, "do you want Mummy to give you a smack?" to which she will reply, "No" (naturally!) and then I say "well, stop it, or that is what will happen." With my DS, he thinks it is a bit of a game sometimes and it doesn't necessarily work with him all the time. He currently giggles at me if I do give him a little smack, so yeah, that one doesn't seem to be working! Still, consistency is the key! And my smacks are obviously not enough to hurt him as he giggles at me.

being that DD is only six and a half months, I don't smack yet but I will. and like most other smackers, I will try other options like time out, taking away privileges or just telling her off, but if she keeps doing that naughty thing knowing that it's naughty and/or dangerous, she'll get a smack. it depends a lot on the kids age though, when she's older, I'll be able to reason with her and explain why I don't want her to do that

I use a smack when I need DD to stop what she's doing immediately

So if she's doing something dangerous or about to hurt her brother etc, she gets a quick warning and then a smack if she doesn't stop right away.

Otherwise she doesn't really get smacked, often the threat of a smack is good enough to pull her up.

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