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Lonely Child with few friends Rss

Help! For the last half an hour I have watched DD, age 5 next week, crying her eyes out because she wants to go and play with the 4 kids who live next door. I don't feel comfortable knocking on their door & asking if my child can come to play, nor do I think they are the type of family who would appreciate it if I did do such a thing! How do I help her make friends, given that she is an odd kid? She totally lacks social graces/skills (which obviously we have tried to instill). She's the kid who rarely gets invited to birthday parties or playdates. She's not a bad kid, or a horror child, she is just not like other kids (and, bless her soul, she doesn't notice or seem to care that she doesn't fit in with her peers). I want her to be able to make and maintain friends, as she is starting prep next year. It breaks me heart when she gets upset because she wants somebody to play with.
have you tried playgroups, mums groups, trying to get together with other mums and their children at swimming or school. being 5 years old, she may nees a little push to make friends or to click with other children, as a oppose to toddler's where they just mingle with anyone.

if she goes to day care, or preschool, have you tried talking to her teachers to see how she interacts with other children, or how they interact with her.

Help! For the last half an hour I have watched DD, age 5 next week, crying her eyes out because she wants to go and play with the 4 kids who live next door. I don't feel comfortable knocking on their door & asking if my child can come to play, nor do I think they are the type of family who would appreciate it if I did do such a thing! How do I help her make friends, given that she is an odd kid? She totally lacks social graces/skills (which obviously we have tried to instill). She's the kid who rarely gets invited to birthday parties or playdates. She's not a bad kid, or a horror child, she is just not like other kids (and, bless her soul, she doesn't notice or seem to care that she doesn't fit in with her peers). I want her to be able to make and maintain friends, as she is starting prep next year. It breaks me heart when she gets upset because she wants somebody to play with.


I totally hope this doesn't offend you but have you ruled out any outside reason your DD may not have any social skills? Lots of kids with very mild forms of ASD can appear to have some odd habits, lack of social skills and difficulty forming friendships.

I'm a teacher and I know that when these little conditions are picked up early, intervention can prevent a whole world of heartache when the child goes to school. Intervention can help identify the issues and teach the skills the child needs to maintain friendships and know the social skills that make fitting in and being accepted so much easier.

As I said, this isn't meant to upset, worry or offend and I truly hope it doesn't!!!!! it may just be worth checking out? smile
Where do you live?

Maybe someone on Huggies would be happy to meet up for a playdate!



Hi. Maybe your daughter is just shy and doesn’t know how to make friends yet – or hasn’t had enough experience with other kids to know what to do. My children are in daycare and being exposed to all those kids didn’t help like I thought it would – in a daycare of 29 children there is a lot going on but it can be daunting if they have’t developed the social skills to cope with it yet.

A way I helped my daughter was to make friends myself with a mum who had children of similar ages to mine. We started doing fun things with the kids like going to parks or run-through fountains in the hot weather. When the children can relax and do an activity they enjoy, they naturally seem to start those connections.

I guess it’s like us adults, we make friends with people who we have things in common with – so we have to help our kids find those things they have in common with each other and encourage them in that area. The rest we leave up to them and if they like each other they like each other, and if they don’t we move on and find another friend for them. If they are a little bit different from other kids, that’s ok – there is a friend for everybody, they just might not be friends with every kid they meet, but there will be someone who they can enjoy an activity with and that is where the friendship will start.

Good luck. You are a great mum for being concerned enough to do something about it ?
Hi I agree with Rosies Mum about ASD. My son has always struggled with friendships, and he has Aspergers. Maybe try to chat with her kindy teacher from this year...
On the plus side my son is now 11 and has one really good friend, so always has someone to play with at school. He also has gained the respect of the other boys in his year at school.
If your DD is like my DS he never liked big groups of friends. Parties are difficult, unless something lie going to the movies. So if trying to arrange play dates try just small groups so that she doesn't feel overwhelmed.
Good luck!
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