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6 year old seeking attention Rss

My 6 year old DD has some serious attention issues. Or at least that what I think is causing her bad behaviour.
She does not listen to me a lot of the time or argues with my or talks back. She has the attitude of a 16 year old, god help when she is 16! :0
We are lost as to how to solve this. It has been going on for about a year now and I dont know if it stems from starting school or the birth of DD2, now 2. Both sort of happened at the same time.
She seems to pick up other kids bad habits and never any good. She is now at that age where she doesn't want to be babied(?) around her friends, youknow cant have mum too close when they're around. Must be cool!

Yesterday we went to the doctors for a check up for me (now pregnant with no.3) and she would not behave. Kept talking and touching everything she wasnt supposed to. Just a little *** and I it's always like this at drs unless its for her and she has the attention directed at her. She just wants to be the focus of everyone!

We try to give her one on one time at night but as soon as its not all about her, she starts acting up.

Would love some advice from parents/teachers who've experienced this...
maybe sport like karate or something..... for her to focus and bepart of a class.

giving warnings before you go somewhere, ''

sometimes instead or arguing with her just saying would you like a cuddle.... there are big gaps between mine and sometime a cuddle is all they need
My 5 year old DD2 is just like this, which has had me stumped for the last few years as DD1 has always been quiet and politely mannered and they were brought up the same. Completely chalk and cheese personalities.
Don't know how much advice I can give but remaining as patient as possible (I know it's hard at times) and pulling her aside to talk it through has always worked best for me. Trying to explain the effect of her bad behaviour. She always tries to wriggle out of it but I am adamant that she looks me in the eyes while I talk to her, which seems to make it sink in more and then also repeats back to me what I've just explained. If she can't then I repeat myself and ask her to repeat it back to me. If she still can't then I change/simplify my explanation. It's all that works... sometimes nothing will.
So frustrating that one child was a breeze and the next was a beautiful but wilful child! Fingers crossed no. 3 is a little easier gasp
Hope this helps, if not, sending my moral support!!!
Hi, I am a mum and an infant teacher. You are not going to alter her behaiour quickly and you are not going to manage it by focusing on her faults. What we do in classrooms is look super hard (sometimes almost impossible) for the behaviour we want to see and give stacks of praise. If you see her being kind to her sister or playing nicely or whatever, make a big fuss of that. Give her the attention she obviously needs for the good things she does. Make it intrinsic though, don't give her 'stuff' give her love and praise 'gosh you are playing so nicely there, what a big girl you are becoming, mummy is super proud of you when she see's you sharing and using your imagination' etc...

Then once you have this underway you can start on the bad stuff. Pick one small thing you want to change (this only works when it is small and directed at one thing at a time). So maybe it's going to the doctors. Talk to her about the behaviour you want to see from her. 'Today at the doctors because you are such a big clever girl, you can show me how lovely and quite you can be ...' Then explain that when you get home she can earn a star for her chart (bit like a calendar with boxes on it, maybe three at this age). She is working towards 3 stars on the chart to earn a reward, ask her what she thinks she would like to earn or make some suggestions like a trip with mummy to the park or extra TV time or whatever speaks to her.

If you stick to this and keep it positive you will find that other behaviours disappear. Start by targetting the one that bugs you the most (in the classroom it might be calling out without putting hands up).

Hope this helps. You have to commit to this though and remember you are never going to alter her beviour by punishing or giving attention to the bad stuff, don't ignore the bad but look extra hard for the good.
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