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a ? for mums with older girls Rss

when they were 4 did they cry, whinge, moan, talk back, fight over anything and everything?????
my dd is soooo sooky its driving me bonkers, if she doesn't get her way she crys, if she has to tidy up she crys, if she can't watch something on t.v she crys. my older son (7) was never this sooky, is it just a girl thing and will she ever grow out of it???
i am sick of all the crying and whinging, i get enough from from my 20 month old let alone a 4 1/2 yr old.
PLEASE TELL ME ITS JUST A PHASE!

I hope someone else can answer this also. I think it's normal but my dd is only 3 1/2. She is exactly the same and i've been hoping it'll stop soon. Hopefully other mums/dads on here can say whether there girls are the same.

My girls didn't do this actually but it sounds like she needs help to express herself and feelings. You could try talking to her about her sadness, anger etc and offer other ways to express it? I mean at her age she doesn't really have alot of ideas. hehe

Maybe you might have to try a VERY FIRM approach. Maybe a mouth washed out with soap for fighting or talking back or something???? I have used this method in the past (for a different thing) and it has worked very well as a deterrant, but it depends on how comfortable you are with that method. I just think that if you don't get on top of these things straight away it just gets worse and worse. Good luck with whatever you choose to do though and I hope it gets better for you soon.

Sorry if she's like one of my girls, she'll always be a whinger. lol btw my DD is 19years old.

I dont have any girls, bur my 4 yr old DS is exactly the same

well i hope that she doesn't winge her whole life! alot of the time she is learning off her older brother and i used to think that she didn't understand properly what she was doing but she is old enough now to understand that it is naughty and i don't like it. she does get sent to "time out" but she still keeps crying and winging, i havn't tried the soap in the mouth trick, i'd feel too mean doing it. she is very shy by nature and i think that she does have trouble expressing how she feels etc, its mainly the crying that is getting to me, she would not go a day without crying about something, but i hope that she will soon learn to express herself in a more positive way. it also doesn't help that her older brother is constantly teasing etc and her younger brother has not yet learnt how to share so he is constantly taking her stuff which upsets her. anyway hopefully there's a pot of gold at the end of her rainbow very soon.

Just remember, sometimes as parents we need to be cruel to be kind, so that when they have to deal with unpalatable circumstances in the future, they have some idea how to get through it when we aren't there to help them. Maybe you could make suggestions to her to help her cope with feelings, like for example if she is angry, instead of chucking a tantrum or hitting her brother/sister or what have you, she could grab the "scream pillow" and scream really loudly into the pillow to expend her anger. You tell her to scream into the pillow until she doesn't feel like screaming anymore. Once she is finished, reward her or congratulate her on handling her anger better and try and get her to explain to you what she was feeling. Perhaps if she is upset or sad about something, you could ask her to draw a picture of why she is sad etc and then have her explain it to you. Tell her you really want to understand what she is feeling and you think you will understand better if she can draw it for. That way her energy is focussed on the drawing and the explaining. perhaps if the older brother is causing some of the problems, the soap might help with him. I just try everything, if one thing doesn't work, I try another and another until I have success. However, I don't like smacking and I know what you mean about the soap, thankfully I have only had to do it about 5 times in total in the 10 and 8 years of life and I always chicken out and just rub it at the front of their mouths! But it still looks to them like I have followed through on my discipline, so they know I mean business. hehe But the idea of it after they have had a small taste is a wonderful deterrant. Whichever way you choose to go, Im sure, with your help, she will get past it. Failing that, I could give you my therapists phone number! hehe

hi pookibum, thanks for your suggestions. she is going to see a peadeatrician soon as both her pre school teacher and myself don't think she is ready for school next year so we are applying to the ed dept to let her stay at pre school for another year so i will bring all this up when i see him and hopefully find a solution. i have threatend with soap and even mustard powder but never actually done it! yes her older brother could definitly do with some soap in the mouth at times but we have other discipline actions for him. again thanks for your advice and i'll keep you updated.

Oh boy my daughter who is now 12 used to cry about everything and anything that was asked of her. She would cry at the drop of a hat and it would drive my hubby and I insane. Its probably the last 12 months that she has stopped doing it so much. Now she just stomps to her room and slams the door. I think it is just a girl thing as her friends all did the same thing. Its just a phase but it does continue for quite awhile so you may have to perservere with it. I would try different things to try to stop her from crying but nothing worked you just have to try and ignore it a bit. Girls are definately a lot harder than boys.
my daughter is 10 and still going through it! not sure if it ever goes away

<a href="">http://s20.photobucket.com/albums/b243/go

HI LADIES, SORRY TO BE THE BEARER OF BAD NEWS, BUT IT IS GOING TO GET WORSE! I HAVE A 14 YR OLD DAUGHTE, AND AM EXPECTING MY 2ND GIRL IN 4 WEEKS. I THINK I WOULD PREFER THE AGE OF 4 AND BELOW. THE OLDER THEY GET THE BITCHIER AND SNOTTIER THEY GET. ON THE OTHER HAND, BOYS ARE MUCH MORE PLACID AND QUIET, MINE IS 16, AND NO PROBLEMS.
Lol i have a 13 year old and she is the worst i think.

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